I'm still alive

I have strong bones, and functioning joints.
My muscles are working and my nervous system is still sensitive.
I have blood pumping through my veins, organs to keep me healthy, and skin to protect me.
I have eyes to see, ears to hear, nose to smell, mouth to talk, and hands to touch.
My heart is still beating.
Though I wish sometimes it wasn't.
I'm not sad, I love my life.
But I want to know what it's like to be completely at peace.
To have no worries, no pain, or stress.
I want to feel bliss. I want to be happy no matter any circumstance.
The only way to reach this is death.
And I know that.
That doesn't mean I'm going to cut my life any shorter than what the big man sees fit.
But in the meantime until I reach this point.
Right from this high school nightmare, my dreams will come true.
My life will have meaning.
I won't just drift through life at a desk job.
I'm going to climb tall mountains, run on beaches, and help those around me.
I want to be a hero. I want to be free. I want to be alive.